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My mum and dad love me. There is no doubt. They are happy their
son is employed by one of the best and biggest banks of eons in the country. Their happiness is
signified by the pictures they keep of my sisters and I on the wall (both in
the city and shags) after graduation. They are hopeful, that one day their son will get out
of the woods and help them erect a decent structure from the semi-permanent one
they live in. That they spent more on education is no lie. Yet, this act of repaying them is taking too long. I can tell that they would really want that in me. That's the reason why I have to keep on keeping on hoping some day, the gates of plural will secede to my bonanza.
Every time I go to visit them and my pockets are bleeding, I feel
like, have I let my peeps or myself down. Well, it’s now three good
years since I left campus. I look at the achievements I can be proud of and
realize I have a blog, my family, and now a job. A job I stick to hoping another will find me in it. But it is because I hate being a jerk. In fact, I am in a frictional kind of unemployment.
There are times I thought I would never secure a job. I prayed to
God and he answered my prayer. Now, it’s not about the job anymore. It's about
breaking even. I have lost drive, ambition and motivation of why I wake up everyday. Yet I still have to do it. Well I don't know who
to blame. I think I have myself to blame because I have not been able to take
the bull by its horns.
I love music. Why lie, the kind that is stale to some but soothing and easing. I am not
the kind of message guy now. I am the kind who loves the energy that music
instills. At least, I can forget about my woes in a while. I find relaxation in
getting to read sometimes with my earphones on nodding to magical nature that is music. Reading is boring but answering
questions is even more boring.
About that snap. If I had the will, I would have gone and removed
it from my peeps walls till that time when life will have metamorphosed. I
wonder what those many visitors normally ask my peeps. Where does your son
work, has he got a breakthrough ever since? Or is he just another leech? What answers do they give. He has just started out. You know in this world you must start from somewhere. He is also still in school. In college. When he finishes in a years time. He will be in a position to fend for himself and a lady because he is aging. We need grandchildren from him. He is the next in line to ensure this lineage is existential. We still pray that things will turn out right for him. He is our son. We still look up to him. But he is not also in a hurry to get there.
Apparently, I have passport copies of those pictures I took. I wrote somewhere about the day on this blog. They are in
my wallet. Once I was showing a colleague at work and out of the woods, our
then branch manager came and found us in the act. And because I used to have this kind of
bizarre relationship with the lady colleague, he used to be of the opinion that
we are or should be dating. That day I felt red. Yet, I was not even thinking of dating at that
point. There was so much in my head now as then and I let it go because that is the
best thing to do.
When I look at it, I see a person who was just doing another thing
that society requires us to do, go to school, get that degree then come out and
start looking for work. Up until now, I have never thought of using the degree.
My current job requires a person to be a form four leaver, but requirements have been
reviewed in other banks to peg the qualification to a university graduate. All these
other certificates are just a by the way. They are like that graduation picture
which has and makes me feel indebted yet when I think that there is nothing I
can do about it, I feel like I should now start having dreams. Valid dreams
that should take me to another level. Well, you know what, creating networks is more easier here than any other job once you get it right.
Hasta La Vista Baby
[Picture Source: Google Images]
