 |
Of recent, I have been a very indolent person ever since the opposite gender charm entered into my system. What with the verve subduing my initial pursuits. The problem is, as a person, I sometimes take too long to accept that I am weak. My ego is just too robust to let go. Chances are, I might end up falling in love or just letting this be a thing that becomes part of life by letting it go. Luckily, the person this piece is directed to may never set eyes on it and this gives me enough reason to deeply introspect whether I derive satisfaction or is it that it is that I am just gullible and can't reign on my emotional cogency.
Let's not call it falling in love but, to soften the stance because falling in love is too big a phrase it requires a lot of dedication and magnanimity since it is not easy to just fall in love just like that as connotatively there is a deeper cognition of what love is. It is usually lust that makes us have this euphoric feeling that makes us to sometimes think in one dimension instead of critically dissecting that which we need to be extra careful about.
Maybe. Who knows? I might one day get my groove on and fall in love and live happily ever after with the lucky chic. When the lucky me gets a chic who will endure and tolerate the fact that I am human and can fall sometimes but will strive to be as true as possible owing to the fact that the world has become too mysterious and unpredictable as you are in danger if you never take proper care, the two of you may just end up being stirred up by love once again. Such sentiments as being the person who when she will not be around, your world would fall apart, or we are a pair because they say two becomes one, she gives me goose bumps and you name it. My happiness is hers and I would never imagine life without her.
There are those times you feel your heart is heavy and burdened just thinking about her. You feel like you want to be a pugilist to evaporate the down moments away or meet an acupuncture doctor to needle the burden away. She makes your loose your mind when she does crazy stuff just to make you feel bad. But she is far away yet so near. She is the kind of person who you never want to meet but just talk to over the phone because that is what you should be doing. Never mind that talking on the phone occupies a majority of your time you forget about blogging. Blogging is the reason why I am writing this escapade.
However, no two people are the same. There are those people who have like six or eight girls they have to choose from. And apparently, most of them wait hoping that lady luck will smile on them and they will walk down the line with the beau only to be disappointed the last minute because the bugger can only marry one woman and he does just that in the long run. Having sampled to his fulfilment. Methinks ladies love emerging from among the rest as the last man standing. It makes them be the envy of others.
Unlike those other guys, yours truly was not born with the gift of the gab of luring or enticing the opposite sex by sweet-talking them to fall for me and being that smooth operator who knows how to make hay while the sun shines. In fact, I am that guy who will either marry when I don't want or never marry totally because I am not sure of what I want, passe. Even if I was, I know that I can never reach that point where I am entertaining more than one. Automatically it will backfire. Déjà vu. One man for one woman and that is what I stick to. Three is a crowd. And that means no intimacy. Maybe let’s just say if things go smoothly, this chic that I have been trying to give my all but she doesn’t appreciate because she has to play hard to get will one day find me in the unluckiest of places where she never thought I would be.
The tension that exists between us is something that goes way back, in as much as we seemed to be hiding it, it was obvious to some. It’s simmering waiting to erupt like a volcano. The tectonic plates will give in one day and an earthquake never seen before will be witnessed. While I may tarry this feeling, the severity of it is that it gains more every time like a rolling snowball. It is not like a rolling stone that gathers no moss.
But there is something about women that we men rarely understand. While it's easy to please a man. The opposite is actually true of a woman. Pleasing her is not that easy. Sometimes you may call relentlessly for long before she picks up. You wonder whether she is no longer interested or just playing hard to get to find out whether you are serious or not. A woman can surely hold a man at ransom. She has the powers to do to you anything knowing very well she can manipulate you with what you have to work hard in order to get. When you are not working, she feels like she is not getting her true worth in you and may inadvertently make spurious choices and decisions that may leave you flabbergasted. It is easy to find a girl these days if chummed but for folks like us who are still emerging, we have to take time hoping that we are not only going to settle for anybody, but that who the heart longs for and has the material of being a wife.
However, it is ladies who sometimes keep us on our toes, they know that loop-hole in men they can machinate. They pressure us to aim for the stars even if we are not. For example, there was a lady who said she can never date a man who looks like he has no focus in life or shows no signs of making it in life. Obviously, she was having a person like me in mind subtly. It was a statement kind of directed to me even though I had never shown interest in her owing to her being beautiful and having that killer smile but so much vexation lingering. We did argue but concluded that that lady who sticks to you during those times when life knocks you down usually ends up a big beneficiary as her mates continue to look for suitable partners money factor notwithstanding.
When money is the reason why a woman loves you, then that would not hold water when things go south (However, there is no single woman who can love you without money). What if the castle comes crumbling down and you are under receivership suffering from liquidity formlessness? Will it mean that the relationship will cease existing? However, in our current materialistic world, it is very complex and complicated to demarcate the reality of whether there is true love or it is the money factor that keeps the embers of the amber hue of the flame dancing fiery, twinkling like stars in the hot swirling air before cascading to earth that may be extinguished by unknown forces.
Judging by the way this thing may whirlpool, it may take up to three years before the ground has been firmly set. There is no hurry in letting it rapture, the time when it will dawn, the cinders will have cooled giving an aura of choking clouds of noxious smoke, that fill the eyes, showering out everything making you to want to cry but you can’t. Which means that I should be ending this with a very delirious ode from one Andrea Dietrich titled, “Cinder Girl”. Here are the words.
An ember sparked will softly glow,
and fed by fuel, will grow and grow.
I once was cinder, sparked by you,
first timid. . . till the flames then grew.
And so our start was touch of dawn,
with amber hue, for I was drawn
to eyes so welcoming and warm
I never guessed you’d do me harm.
Like morning glory, love in June
the rapture of mid-afternoon,
romance of which the ancients wrote,
our passion had no antidote.
And with the dusk, though scarlet tinged,
our love began to come unhinged,
for clouds arrived, which filled your eyes,
extinguishing bright twilight skies.
With cold of night came shadows’ pall,
and I could not tear down your wall.
By midnight’s hour, the fire was dead.
Mere ashes smoldered in its stead.
You left, and should you reappear,
I’ve vowed to shun you. Now
I fear
the very thing for which I yearn -
one touch. . . and then again - to burn.
And on that note allow
me to sign off with my signature phrase from "La Furia Roja"
HASTA LA VISTA BABY.
[Photo Source: My Own]
[Photo Source: My Own]
