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Ken Ouko once intimated a story
of one of his friends who was a city proletariat. In Nairobi, you need to be
free with your money as stinginess has repercussions - being economical is however different. Misers rarely make it in this city that has become so
expensive and is currently the best investment hub in Africa. What of places
like Caramel where you are charged an arm and a leg for a tot of whisky (40 K,
am not buying that sooner), Deacons and Mr. Price will rob you in broad daylight
in the name of selling you haute couture which are adorned by commoners in 9ja.
Nairobians especially those who assume that the other side of life does not exist (read Eastlands and sprawling slums) will lavishly spend their cash in places like Subway, Naked Pizza, KFC, Cold Stone and all those American franchises that have opened shop in the county.
One of my lady friends once told me that in the initial days of getting acquainted to his lecture mannerism, she usually found Ken kind of arrogant and a man of too much show off. While a freshman, he never came to lecture with a book or notes during the single semester I undertook sociology. He lectured or is it to dictate from his mind- cramming power maybe. He was similar to teacher known as Mr. Bean who taught Chemistry while we were in high school. Mr. Bean (RIP) had this demeanor so gauche yet students still loved him because he was like a role model (many peeps never liked bathing while in high school as the weather was mostly cold). Mr. Bean had a one trouser and a shirt he wore for the whole term. He changed on rare occasions also because he was a bachelor.
So while lecturing on sociology, during a brief interlude, he talked of this friend of his who refused to tip the mundane CBD parking boys (I don’t know there Sheng name or right name of reference). Every day the bugger was asked for a paltry Sh.50 which he had, he would refuse to pay because he thought the boys never offered security to his contraption. This went on for months as he failed to pay the boys who are very crafty, ingenuous and you can do nothing to them. Talk of creating a niche in the city to become a sanctioned tenet as they abet sometimes with the county parking fee collectors.
One day when the bugger was from work, he went to his car as usual. He was cock sure of the place he had parked his car but upon checking, he found another car. Perturbed and mesmerized about the turn of events, he went straight to the council parking lot attendants to ask for the whereabouts of his car. He was directed to the parking boys who hitherto he had no respect for. The boys told him the truth that his car had been stolen and he could never recover it as they spend the whole day in the city acting as security and he undermined their importance and role in providing security.
To cut the long story short, the guy had to buy a new car because apparently the car had no tracking device. Upon purchase, he duly paid the parking boys like it was a routine and in excess. They became great friends. He had learnt his lesson never to mess up with those he considered of low nobility and having no clout. Him underrating the parking boys saw him learn a critical lesson in life.
I usually think that using the name watchmen is kind of shady and demeaning (I prefer sentry as opposed to soldier because it sounds cool and neo). Being a sentry is a very tasking job. Human resource chaps say that each and every job needs to be respected as they contribute to the general wellness and profitability of the other roles that people have to do within a firm. As in everyone is worthy of status within an organization and also within the home where they are essential.
Most sentries are usually very receptive of people who do not appear arrogant and disrespectful of their job. I love them because they usually have the most local or the most hilarious stories. There is this sentry who talked of a woman who took an accomplice or is it a neighbor to Kibera law courts because the neighbor’s cat had eaten their sumptuous meal of chicken which was for supper. Chicken is a fine delicacy in some places and it being relatively expensive as a meal, the lady found a score to settle with a neighbor she probably wanted to fix.
Sentries sometimes do implement their roles and functions in a way that any exchange of words between you and him will be viewed as an act of undermining him. They can easily turn a molehill into a mountain just because you failed to do something that you ought to have done notwithstanding the fact that it may be a very trivial issue that you are arguing over. Barasa was forced to resign because of ‘the you should know people’ sentry altercation.
Having had my altercations with a majority of sentries, especially those that man the many building in town, I have learnt to let them have their way. That way, even if I have to rudely reply when incensed, I keep quite because they know better and smile to ease the tension. They can easily embarrass you and make you feel like you are on the wrong while in reality some may be on the wrong. All this in the name of implementing law and order and following instructions.
The sentries who however usually catch my eye are those who check cars in public places. While it is their right to check the car, the manner in which they do it sometimes is alarming as it is full of indifference and insouciance. Just because we are so innocent doesn’t mean everyone is harmless. Burglars usually use such loopholes to rob even the most protected of facilities due to nonchalance. In fact, what most of those sentries do is ubiquitously palpable. The concave metal detectors sometimes leave me with my tongue in the cheek because I never know whether the users know how to use them or the gadgets cannot be able to aptly carry out their functions.
Ever since Al Shabaab reined havoc, the devices are used everywhere and it is only fair that the people who use them are well trained on how the devices function. It is only while going to renew my unreadable driving license in Times Tower that I was thoroughly screened by the sentries. All the others do what I presume is a slight metal massage of the body. They are never serious or the devices are generic and only sold because someone could supply them having secured a tender to do so. The shoddy screening sometimes with bare hands is usually very embarrassing.
While most sentries like to be tipped, those who will never fail to ask for something small are those who work where parking spaces are usually very scarce. As a person who loves and respects them, I know what a Sh.20 coin can do to a sentry. However I usually like giving out software. Doing hardware is so old school and the sentry usually has a low opinion of who you are in relation to cash. If you are a regular and keep on giving coins, chances are there is a time they will conspire and never let you have that parking space even if available.
Giving a sentry sh.100 is like making his day. They will act with zeal and can be at your service as if you are their master. Chances are he will not foot back home and may probably buy something better if he collects more from the many cars that park. If you never give out any money to the sentry, then, like the parking boys they can mess you up when you least expected. Again if you give out more, they will easily welcome you with open hands and will never mind if on that fateful day you never had something small to tip them. They are humans and understand when things are thick. They will serve you as usual knowing full well there are times when the tap also runs dry.
But you can never know when the sentry will be transferred to another station. There was a sentry I was so used to in a certain hospital in town. I have this culture ingrained in me that I should be having some Sh. 50 or more to give them for the good work they do. During the first few days, he used to look at my car warily and precisely confirm before letting me in because the place had a small parking space. As time went by, he got used to my car and would easily let me in as it became a routine of being tipped after seeking the services of the doctor. Even if the place was full, he would find a way of ensuring I never parked outside.
When the sentry was transferred, it took me time before I could be able to get acquainted to the incoming sentry. First of all, she was a lady and dealing with ladies is a bit tricky. Some are ever looking daggers and you might be apprehensive giving that tip during the first time they open the gate on your exit. As such you only greet them and callowly gibber some inaudible goodbye before you fully get acquainted to their comfort zone to decide whether it will continue being business as usual.
Chances could be they were transferred because of continuously soliciting for some alms and those who are not used to such behaviors reported to the authorities and that could be the reason for relocation. What is for sure is that when you give no matter how small the amount is and you explain the reason, the sentry will even make it his duty to stop other cars to let your car have way while navigating to the main road. Small things that really count in life.
I revere all sentries, they risk and sacrifice their lives and encounter a lot. Even though some may have robust ATT, majority are very cordial. They have the best stories that if you have an ear for comedy, surely you will be treated to some rib cracking jokes for free. Because most tell it as it is without fear of debasing their reputation in life. Whether it is that woman who beats or cheats her husband, a Miss Mboch who is lose and entertains all and sundry in he vajayjay; trust the watchie to tell you about it with the segue of a good song that eases your day on a Bad Monday morning. Obviously, these people have no adept in keeping secrets they hear no matter how critical it may be.
SITUONANE.
[Photo Source: Google Images]
Nairobians especially those who assume that the other side of life does not exist (read Eastlands and sprawling slums) will lavishly spend their cash in places like Subway, Naked Pizza, KFC, Cold Stone and all those American franchises that have opened shop in the county.
One of my lady friends once told me that in the initial days of getting acquainted to his lecture mannerism, she usually found Ken kind of arrogant and a man of too much show off. While a freshman, he never came to lecture with a book or notes during the single semester I undertook sociology. He lectured or is it to dictate from his mind- cramming power maybe. He was similar to teacher known as Mr. Bean who taught Chemistry while we were in high school. Mr. Bean (RIP) had this demeanor so gauche yet students still loved him because he was like a role model (many peeps never liked bathing while in high school as the weather was mostly cold). Mr. Bean had a one trouser and a shirt he wore for the whole term. He changed on rare occasions also because he was a bachelor.
So while lecturing on sociology, during a brief interlude, he talked of this friend of his who refused to tip the mundane CBD parking boys (I don’t know there Sheng name or right name of reference). Every day the bugger was asked for a paltry Sh.50 which he had, he would refuse to pay because he thought the boys never offered security to his contraption. This went on for months as he failed to pay the boys who are very crafty, ingenuous and you can do nothing to them. Talk of creating a niche in the city to become a sanctioned tenet as they abet sometimes with the county parking fee collectors.
One day when the bugger was from work, he went to his car as usual. He was cock sure of the place he had parked his car but upon checking, he found another car. Perturbed and mesmerized about the turn of events, he went straight to the council parking lot attendants to ask for the whereabouts of his car. He was directed to the parking boys who hitherto he had no respect for. The boys told him the truth that his car had been stolen and he could never recover it as they spend the whole day in the city acting as security and he undermined their importance and role in providing security.
To cut the long story short, the guy had to buy a new car because apparently the car had no tracking device. Upon purchase, he duly paid the parking boys like it was a routine and in excess. They became great friends. He had learnt his lesson never to mess up with those he considered of low nobility and having no clout. Him underrating the parking boys saw him learn a critical lesson in life.
I usually think that using the name watchmen is kind of shady and demeaning (I prefer sentry as opposed to soldier because it sounds cool and neo). Being a sentry is a very tasking job. Human resource chaps say that each and every job needs to be respected as they contribute to the general wellness and profitability of the other roles that people have to do within a firm. As in everyone is worthy of status within an organization and also within the home where they are essential.
Most sentries are usually very receptive of people who do not appear arrogant and disrespectful of their job. I love them because they usually have the most local or the most hilarious stories. There is this sentry who talked of a woman who took an accomplice or is it a neighbor to Kibera law courts because the neighbor’s cat had eaten their sumptuous meal of chicken which was for supper. Chicken is a fine delicacy in some places and it being relatively expensive as a meal, the lady found a score to settle with a neighbor she probably wanted to fix.
Sentries sometimes do implement their roles and functions in a way that any exchange of words between you and him will be viewed as an act of undermining him. They can easily turn a molehill into a mountain just because you failed to do something that you ought to have done notwithstanding the fact that it may be a very trivial issue that you are arguing over. Barasa was forced to resign because of ‘the you should know people’ sentry altercation.
Having had my altercations with a majority of sentries, especially those that man the many building in town, I have learnt to let them have their way. That way, even if I have to rudely reply when incensed, I keep quite because they know better and smile to ease the tension. They can easily embarrass you and make you feel like you are on the wrong while in reality some may be on the wrong. All this in the name of implementing law and order and following instructions.
The sentries who however usually catch my eye are those who check cars in public places. While it is their right to check the car, the manner in which they do it sometimes is alarming as it is full of indifference and insouciance. Just because we are so innocent doesn’t mean everyone is harmless. Burglars usually use such loopholes to rob even the most protected of facilities due to nonchalance. In fact, what most of those sentries do is ubiquitously palpable. The concave metal detectors sometimes leave me with my tongue in the cheek because I never know whether the users know how to use them or the gadgets cannot be able to aptly carry out their functions.
Ever since Al Shabaab reined havoc, the devices are used everywhere and it is only fair that the people who use them are well trained on how the devices function. It is only while going to renew my unreadable driving license in Times Tower that I was thoroughly screened by the sentries. All the others do what I presume is a slight metal massage of the body. They are never serious or the devices are generic and only sold because someone could supply them having secured a tender to do so. The shoddy screening sometimes with bare hands is usually very embarrassing.
While most sentries like to be tipped, those who will never fail to ask for something small are those who work where parking spaces are usually very scarce. As a person who loves and respects them, I know what a Sh.20 coin can do to a sentry. However I usually like giving out software. Doing hardware is so old school and the sentry usually has a low opinion of who you are in relation to cash. If you are a regular and keep on giving coins, chances are there is a time they will conspire and never let you have that parking space even if available.
Giving a sentry sh.100 is like making his day. They will act with zeal and can be at your service as if you are their master. Chances are he will not foot back home and may probably buy something better if he collects more from the many cars that park. If you never give out any money to the sentry, then, like the parking boys they can mess you up when you least expected. Again if you give out more, they will easily welcome you with open hands and will never mind if on that fateful day you never had something small to tip them. They are humans and understand when things are thick. They will serve you as usual knowing full well there are times when the tap also runs dry.
But you can never know when the sentry will be transferred to another station. There was a sentry I was so used to in a certain hospital in town. I have this culture ingrained in me that I should be having some Sh. 50 or more to give them for the good work they do. During the first few days, he used to look at my car warily and precisely confirm before letting me in because the place had a small parking space. As time went by, he got used to my car and would easily let me in as it became a routine of being tipped after seeking the services of the doctor. Even if the place was full, he would find a way of ensuring I never parked outside.
When the sentry was transferred, it took me time before I could be able to get acquainted to the incoming sentry. First of all, she was a lady and dealing with ladies is a bit tricky. Some are ever looking daggers and you might be apprehensive giving that tip during the first time they open the gate on your exit. As such you only greet them and callowly gibber some inaudible goodbye before you fully get acquainted to their comfort zone to decide whether it will continue being business as usual.
Chances could be they were transferred because of continuously soliciting for some alms and those who are not used to such behaviors reported to the authorities and that could be the reason for relocation. What is for sure is that when you give no matter how small the amount is and you explain the reason, the sentry will even make it his duty to stop other cars to let your car have way while navigating to the main road. Small things that really count in life.
I revere all sentries, they risk and sacrifice their lives and encounter a lot. Even though some may have robust ATT, majority are very cordial. They have the best stories that if you have an ear for comedy, surely you will be treated to some rib cracking jokes for free. Because most tell it as it is without fear of debasing their reputation in life. Whether it is that woman who beats or cheats her husband, a Miss Mboch who is lose and entertains all and sundry in he vajayjay; trust the watchie to tell you about it with the segue of a good song that eases your day on a Bad Monday morning. Obviously, these people have no adept in keeping secrets they hear no matter how critical it may be.
SITUONANE.
[Photo Source: Google Images]
